Each week, millions of people connect to the podcast “We can do Things”, on which writer Glennon Doyle, his wife, Olympic gold medalist Abby WambachAnd his sister, former lawyer Amanda Doyle, interviews famous guests. The title of the podcast was inspired by a sign with this sentence which hung in the second year class of his colleague Josie just at the corner of the street at the time. (Doyle was a young teacher trying to become sober.)
Shelf Help is a chronicle of well -being where we interview researchers, thinkers and writers on their last books – all in order to learn to live a more complete life.
But two years ago, difficult things would start to accumulate: Glennon was diagnosed with anorexia, Amanda was diagnosed with breast cancer and Abby's brother died suddenly. To help Abby through his sorrow, Glennon left a Samuel Beckett quote on his pillow. Abby made the favor with a quote on the body image. The model continued, and the three hosts began to collect wisdom nuggets from their podcast and other sources to help each other. Soon, they had built a gigantic digital file full of lessons on sorrow, body image, health and other subjects. This file inspired their book, “We can do difficult things: answers to the 20 questions of life ” (Penguin Random House), a collection of lessons on each category of life, answering questions like Chapter 1 “Why am I like that?” in chapter 20 “What is the indicate? “”
For them, the book is a manual to be alive. “When you travel to a new country, you need a guide,” said Doyle. “When you travel through love, sorrow, joy, parenthood, friendship, uncertainty, aging, sorrow, new beginnings – life – you also need a guide.” As such, the book offers advice and wisdom of 118 “Wayfinders”, many of whom were guests of Doyle's previous Podcast.
Times spoke with Doyle of the way it remains full of hope in dark times and aims to raise compassionate and resilient children.
This interview was condensed and published for more clarity.
Glennon Doyle
(Photo of Alex Hedison)
In the book, Elizabeth Gilbert discusses the negative impact of social media on women. You recently said that leaving social media in the past year had had an impact on your nervous system that stops drinking. What does your relationship with him look like, especially in terms of marketing your book?
Social media made me feel terrible: (when I used it), I felt less human and more angry, and I started to lose my ability to see people like people rather than ideologies. One day after deleting it in the fall, I sent a text to my team to give me the passwords (which they did not do it). I was reminded when I hidden bottles of alcohol above the refrigerator; The next day, (I find myself) to make scales out of the chairs and pillows to obtain it. Now that I am not on social networks, I am starting to feel more courageous with my art, because I do not worry about the way people will react to what I put in the world.
One of the chapters of your book is largely inspired by the wisdom you have acquired throughout your trip with anorexia. What is it to be so public in your food disorder in a culture that stigmatizes mental illness?
I'm fine if I don't hide anything. Recently, I wrote in my newsletter on the way when my catering problems appear again, I fear that my whole family would think: “Are you kidding?” Why are you not yet above that? ” A foreigner wrote by saying: “The humping whales are born with a song they sing since the moment they die, and that's how they locate their family. You are just a humpback whale.” It gave me such comfort.
The other evening during a prize ceremony, a woman said to me: “Are you incredible! What is your secret?” I often find that people tell me that I am at my best when I do my worst. So I said: “My secret is that I have anorexia. I have a serious mental disorder. It's not healthy, and I try to beat this.” I try to find a way to travel the public part, but to tell the truth always helps a little.
At one point, the book suggest That our anger can report to us when things are not going to our society. Generally, do you stay connected with people whose political beliefs are opposed to yours?
I agree with James Baldwin: “We can disagree and still love ourselves unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and my denial of my humanity and the right to exist.” If you think it is normal for a child to be trained out of his house, put in a detention center and put a court without representation or explanation, I am not interested in building bridges with you.
That said, in a way, I feel less divided now. Human rights have become so threatened that if you are someone who wants to protect the most vulnerable people in this country, at the moment, I am not giving like – what else you believe. Let's get along together and we beat. The rise in fascism has always occurred when the left was busy chatting with whom they were going and would not align. I am now more open to alignment with people who agree with me on the basics: children should be protected, people should be able to love who they like and people of any class or skin color should have access to money, hope and freedom.
Take -out
from Glennon Doyle
How about people who want to experience parents but do not want to raise children in today's world?
When I say I'm happy to have done it, I'm really happy. I do not say that I would have liked to know better so that I would not have done it. I think, especially recently, a deep terror on the fact that my children are in this world. I have taught them a lot about justice, and now they do courageous things in the world related to justice that scares me. They are still young, and it breaks my heart to think of them wondering where adults are in all of this. Some of the people I know who have the most incredible maternal energy, who the most, are people who have no children. I think the idea that a parent or a mother is something you are only if you give birth to a child is false. There is a maternal energy that we need more than ever, that each person can trigger in their communities, their families and their local governments, whether or not they have children.
(Maggie Chiang / For Times)
The last chapter of your book is called “What is the indicate? “What do you say to people who all have the same feelings as you about the state of the world but that you feel that working towards change is theoretical?
My favorite story concerns a Vietnam protester who stood outside the White House every night with a small candle. It looked ridiculous for everyone, and after enough time, a journalist came and said, “What do you do? Do you think this little candle will change policy?” And he said, “I don't stand out here every night to change them. I stand out every night so that they don't change me.”
Our job is not to change the world. The reason to introduce yourself is not to make others more human – it is so that you do not become inhuman. You have to do everything you can every day to make sure you don't lose your love, joy, humanity or your desire to live. This seems dramatic until you study the rise of fascism through history, which has always required a slowdown in death, numbness and apathy in people. Whatever you can do to stay to believe, stay in love, stay in hope and stay in compassion is your duty.
Shelf Help is a chronicle of well -being where we interview researchers, thinkers and writers on their last books – all in order to learn to live a more complete life. Do you want to start? E-mail Alyssa.bereznak@latimes.com.
